Another week has passed, and for being a short week it was far from easy. I have discovered that discipline on the days right before holiday is almost useless at this point. The kids are even more talkative and distractible than usual, and I can punish all I want without effecting much change.
The two days off of school have been good to me, however. I have a new drive to give my kids the best I can, and I am determined to be a better teacher. The kids are hard to control, but I just need to try harder and keep on figuring out what works. I know that I will have parent complaints soon, but I am determined to teach these kids whatever it takes. I am going to do my part to the best of my ability, and the rest is up to God and the children themselves. Paul says that he boasts of his infirmities that God’s power may rest upon him. Teaching is far from my strength, but I know that if God brought me here, he can supply all that I lack.
Thursday and Friday we had no school in honor of Independence Day. Thursday there was a parade and fair complete with a random assortment of animals (one cow, 2 horses, and some ducks), martial arts demonstrations, Palauan and Polynesian Dances, and lots of food. For the parade there were quite a few people in cultural dress. Lets just say that we saw more than we really wanted to of a lot of people.
Parade
Some type of Palauan dance
Jasmine and Kaitlynn at the Japanese booth. The goal was to get 30 beans into the cup, and we all failed epically.
Friday afternoon were boat races by the causeway connecting Koror and Babeldaob. I only stayed for about an hour, since the races were not too exciting and I couldn’t understand any of the commentary given over the loudspeaker in Palauan. Many of the booths from Thursday relocated to right near the bridge, hawking souvenirs, coconuts, meat and rice in various forms, and ice candy for 25 cents. Ice candy is something like ice cream, except in a plastic tube. You bite off the top and suck out the contents like you do with go-gurt. So far I have had mocha, and it is amazing.
Week 7 started out with the promise of promise of improvement and lots of optimism. It is now late Wednesday night, and I am tired. God has restored me, but I am fighting exhaustion and discouragement. I know that somehow God is going to turn this year around, but I still worry because I know I don’t have what it takes. God called me here for a purpose. He’s going to have to take it from here, because I’m not sure what else to do.
Highlights of my day: *I’ve learned that I’m losing one of my students in November as she’s moving to the Philippines. I am also gaining one from 1st grade. *I had guests come in today for Social Studies to talk about different countries (so far we’ve visited Canada, Mexico, and Tennessee). I had a talk with my students about respecting their teachers, and they were good for our guests but disrespectful to me as soon as the guests left. Laden turned around, actually angry, and said, “Why are we so quiet for the other teachers and so disrespectful to her? Huh? Why?” Exactly what I’d like to know. Then Noel pipes up, “Because we’re noisy”, and the moment was lost.
* Molly has proved to be one of my sweetest students, and she always wants to talk to me (we had drama yesterday about a loose tooth =). She was talking to me about her Pilipino friend. She said that her mom “was really pretty. Like you.”
Sunday, October 11
In hindsight, the past two weeks have gone fairly well. I can see myself slowly climbing upward on the learning curve, and I think I might be starting to see a light at the end of the discipline tunnel. After the discouragement of Wednesday, Thursday was an incredible surprise. Whether because of all the praying I did or something else (I am pretty sure it was prayer), my kids were (for them) angels. We started a new individual reward program in addition to the class-wide “bean bank”. I didn’t want to add on more rewards, since it feels like I am bribing them and I honestly believe that the satisfaction of doing a job well and following directions should be reward enough. But realistically, I needed it, and I can see it already starting to affect some of the students (Thanks Mrs. Good and Miss Jolene for the inspiration). The kids get marbles in their cup for good behavior, homework turned in, etc. and marbles removed for bad behavior. Once the cup is filled, they get to choose a prize. The cups are clear, and I can see them staring at the marbles and counting how many they have in comparison with everyone else.
In addition to the new reward system, I am also trying another incentive for good behavior disguised as a fun learning activity (sneaky!). Every Friday (if the kids cooperate), we are going to a different country in the world for Social Studies. This Friday we visited Italy. (When I told the kids on Thursday that we were going to Italy on Friday, they seriously thought we were going to Italy. They were so disappointed when I told them we were going in our imaginations. “What? That’s boring. I thought we were going to get on a real plane.”) We boarded the plane, passed China, and the Alps, and landed in Rome. I had an Italian masquerade mask that I had used for my Senior Recognition at GLAA (I know, who brings that to a foreign country?) that I put on. I was the pilot, and I told my passengers that they had to follow directions in order to stay on the plane. Some of the kids left the line and didn’t keep their seatbelts buckled. I think we lost them somewhere over the Mediterranean Sea, and unfortunately for them they missed out on the garlic bread in Venice (it was so fun trying to explain that to the siblings and parents who came to pick them up. “Tell your mom what happened, Alfons. I think you fell into the ocean today on the way to Italy.”) Next week, if they are good, we are going to a country in Africa. The student with the best behavior gets to be the pilot. I am trying hard not to get my hopes up, but I am excited about the possibilities the idea has. Our Social Studies book even has patterns for passports, travel logs, and manila envelope suitcases.
(We had to make a stop on the way to Italy. Heads down, passengers. You aren't following directions.)
(We had to make a stop on the way to Italy. Heads down, passengers. You aren't following directions.)
Mmm, garlic bread!
funny faces
Apparently Palau was on a tsunami warning sometime last week. No worries, we’re fine. We definitely need prayers, however. PMA and Airai church are built on property that was donated many years ago by some church members. Apparently the paperwork wasn’t filled out correctly, so the families now own the land again. We are praying that they will redonate the land to the church instead of keeping it. The land that PMA is on is good land, and if the family decides to keep it, I don’t know what will happen. The church and the people who own the land are meeting on Thursday to discuss things, so please keep that in your prayers. We also have two church members very sick with cancer, and they need a lot of prayer.
I have been coming to a lot of spiritual realizations lately. The thoughts are not original, but they are just now beginning to be appropriated into more than just knowledge. I will share more when I update later this week, but some of the main things I have realized are these. God is not something to be trifled with. He is not a “tame lion” (C.S. Lewis), and He is greater than we could ever begin to understand. And this great, all-powerful, holiest of holies God, loves us weak, complaining, petulant, confused humans. It should be so simple. If we really remembered God’s love for us, we would live differently. Often we don’t trust God to help us conquer our sins and just give up without really letting God’s power into our lives and problems. Are we afraid to be great, to have the integrity of Joseph, the patience of Moses, the heart of God like David, to really live for God, no reservations? Are we are too content with our mediocre Christianity? I am praying that God will help me to not only desire greatness, but to live a real, vibrant faith like the heroes in the Old Testament.
I apologize for the long wait for a blog. I will attempt to do better.
Bet you NEVER thought you'd learn so much...so soon as an SM did ya?
ReplyDeleteHang in there Courtney...lots of prayers for you.
Dan